Reviews

# | A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K | L | M | N | O | P | Q | R | S | T | U | V | W | X | Y | Z

#
12 Rounds – WWE’s John Cena puts Bruce Willis to shame

A
Abraham Lincoln vs. Zombies – Lincoln no slave to zombies
Air Bud: Golden Receiver – a football playing dog
American Pie Presents: The Naked Mile – Nude shenanigans ensue
Attack of the Killer Tomatoes – Produce goes bad….really bad!

B
Baby Geniuses – Super intelligent film about super intelligent babies
Bald – Sexy web cam girls help pay for hair transplant
Barbie: The Princess and the Popstar – Enthusiastic about fantastic plastic classic
Baywatch: Hawaiian Wedding – Baywatch reunion flick a sexy affair
Beaver, The – A dam fine film starring everyone’s favourite social pariah, Mel Gibson
Beerfest – An intoxicating comedy
Best Worst Movie – A loving tribute to beloved film Troll 2
Bigfoot’s Wild Weekend – Boobs, beer and Bigfoot
Born to Raise Hell – Steven Seagal kicks ass, possibly takes names as well
Bigfoot – Environmentally friendly sasquatch film
Blood on the Flat Track: Rise of the Rat City Rollergirls – Roller Derby film never goes off track
Body Slam – Rock and wrestling meet, and make beautiful music together
Bottoms Up– Paris Hilton and Jay of Silent Bob and Jay fame
Bounty Hunters– This bounty hunter is no Dog
Bride of Chucky– Bride of Chucky is anything but sucky
Bronies: The Extremely Unexpected Adult Fans of My Little Pony– Doc introduces us to My Little Pony loving men

C
Camp Cheerleader– Campy thriller will have you cheering
Canadian Bacon– Michael Moore’s most important film
Captain EO– Michael Jackson, George Lucas and Francis Ford Coppola team up for 4D romp
Cat in the Hat– Meow!!!
Cats & Dogs– Warring pet film is paw-sitively delightful
Catwoman – Halle Berry is purr-fect as crime fighting feline
Chillerama – Sperm + Hitler = big laughs
Christmas Story, A – You’ll wish someone shot your eyes out
Christmas Story 2, A – A Christmas miracle
Citizen Kane – Greatest film of all-time, or steaming pile of feces?
Cleanflix – Taking the filth out of film
Cocktail – Tom Cruise serving up drinks, and excellence
Condemned, The – Steve Austin conquers films after conquering wrestling
Cool as Ice – Vanilla Ice, leading man
Crank 2: High Voltage – Ridiculous. Illogical. Over the top. Profane. Excellent.
Crossroads – Britney Spears in the first of what will be many starring roles
Cutting Edge 3: Chasing the Dream, The – Figure skating film full of elegance, beauty and grace

D
Damage – Steve Austin fights to save a life
D.C. Cab – D.C. Cab deserves an A+
Dead or Alive – Sexiest video game since Dr. Mario comes to the big screen
Dead Silence – Oh those creepy ventriloquist dummies
Death Race 2000 – Corman, Carradine and Stallone in a race far more terrifying than Cannonball Run
Deep Blue Sea – Sharks, Samuel L. Jackson and LL Cool J – what more do you people want?
Dukes of Hazzard: The Beginning, The – Willie Nelson and a pair of Daisy Dukes highlight this origin story

E
Elvira, Mistress of the Dark – One of the breast horror comedies you will ever see
Ernest Saves Christmas – The importance of seeing Ernest
Every Which Way But Loose – Clint Eastwood engages in some monkey business

F
Fair Game – Cindy Crawford runs from the Russian mob
Flintstones, The – I yabba dabba do love this movie!
Funky Monkey – A champ among chimps

G
Gambler, The – Kenny Rogers film based on the classic tune
Gigli – Watching Gigli would be Ben-eficial
Gingerdead Man, The – Attack of the homicidal baked good
Glitter – Mariah Carey’s extraordinary film debut
Godfather, The – An offer you can’t refuse – don’t watch it!
Graduate, The – A young Dustin Hoffman encounters a cougar

H
Hamburger: The Motion Picture – You’ll be jerkin’ your gherkin over this one
Hannah Montana: The Movie – Miley goes to live on a farm
Haunted World of El Superbeasto, The – Superbeasto is super good
He-Man & She-Ra: A Christmas Special – He-Man and She-Ra show that It’s a Master-ful Life
Herbie Fully Loaded – Lohan film loaded with laughs
Hobo With a Shotgun – See title of film for description
Hottie and The Nottie, The – Paris Hilton befriends a homely girl
How the West Was Fun – Olsen twins take over where Eastwood and John Wayne left off

I
I’ll be Home For Christmas – Cross-country Claus chaos with Jessica Biel and JTT
Iron Sky – Astro-Nazis have got the Reich stuff
iSteve – A-peel-ing Apple film is good to the core
I Think We’re Alone Now – Popstar Tiffany inspires some really dedicated fans
It’s Pat – A Saturday Night Live inspired tender gender bender

J
Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter – Son of God battles Nosferatu
Jingle All The Way – Arnold Schwarzenegger attempts to buy his child’s love
Junior – Arnold Schwarzenegger gives birth to loads of laughter
Just One of the Guys – Gender-bender full of splendour

K
Karate Dog – Jaime Pressly, Jon Voight and a kung fu dog
Kazaam – Shaq doing what he does best, playing a rapping genie
KISS Meets The Phantom of the Park – KISS in a can’t miss
King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters – Donkey Kong documentary
Knucklehead – WWE’s Big Show saves orphans by competing in MMA

L
Ladybugs – Rodney Dangerfield cross-dressing soccer comedy
Legendary – John Cena amateur wrestling drama
Leonard Part 6 – Legendary Bill Cosby spy comedy
Leprechaun – Jen Aniston helps spawn the legendary franchise
Leprechaun 2 – The little fellas back, looking for love
Leprechaun 4: In Space – The little fellas back again, in space
Life-Size – Tyra & LiLo in doll come to life tale
Like Mike – Bow Wow bow-wows the critics in this child basketball star tale
Love Guru, The – Mike Myers as a self help guru to the stars

M
Manos: The Hands of Fate – A cult classic – all the cults love it
Marine, The – Historic first starring role for John Cena
Masters of the Universe – Classic toy line comes to the big screen
Material Girls – Duff sisters channeling Paris and Nicole
Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus – exactly what the title says
Mighty Ducks, The – Film that inspired the future Stanley Cup winner
Million Dollar Baby – Baby needs to be changed
Moneyball – Pitt hits into unassisted triple play
Monster Brawl – Monster Brawl a must see for all
My Monkey Baby – Folks raising primates instead of children

N
National Lampoon’s Dorm Daze 2 – Sexy seafaring shenanigans
No Holds Barred – Hulk Hogan’s first starring role
Nude Nuns With Big Guns – Just like church, but with 97% more naked chicks

O
Over The Top – The greatest arm wrestling film bar none

P
Paradise – Journey of self discovery aided by chimps
Passion Play – Megan Fox sports wings, and this has nothing to do with feminine hygiene products
Piranha 3D – Fish killing just for the halibut
Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead – One clucking good movie
President’s Man, The – Chuck Norris as the President’s secret weapon
Private Valentine: Blonde and Dangerous – Jessica Simpson enlists
Project ALF – Wisecraking alien returns to butt heads to Martin Sheen

Q
No Q movies have been reviewed yet

R
Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale – Finnish film introduces us to naked, evil Santa Claus
Recoil – Stone Cold battles Machete in dream matchup
Return to Fantasy Island – Pre-quel to the landmark TV series
Roadhouse – Patrick Swayze as a cooler in one of the all-time classics
Robotropolis – Not all robots are lovable – some are quite deadly
Rollerball – LL Cool J, Rebecca Romijn and Chris Klein compete in the sport of the future
Room, The – No Room for improvement when it comes to this cult classic
Rubber – You’ll never tire of watching this film

S
Santa Claus – the greatest Mexican film about Santa Claus taking place in space you will likely ever see
Santa Claus Conquers the Martians – a yuletide cult classic
Santa With Muscles – Hulkster thinks he’s Santa
Santa’s Slay – Homicidal Santa goes on a killing spree
See No Evil – A killer that Kane not be stopped
Sex Hex – Vampire sucks everything but blood
Scooby-Doo! WrestleMania Mystery – Doo not miss this Scooby/WWE mashup
Sharknado – You will be blown away by Sharknado
Shark Night – Head and fin above the competition
Showgirls – The artform of stripping is presented in a extremely tasteful manner
Sex Sells – Mockumentary about the making of an adult classic
Shaolin vs. Ninja – Karate kicks and funky facial hair galore
Shawshank Redemption, The – Prison “classic” is more punishing than a prison shower
Sorority Row – College kids getting bumped off left and right
Space Buddies – Canines in outer space
Spice World – The Spice Girls make film debut in rollicking comedy
Spymate – The adventures of a secret agent…who is a monkey!
Star Wars: The Clone Wars – big screen version of the animated series
Star Wars: The Holiday Special – Meet Chewie’s family, hear Leia sing
Suburban Commando – You won’t regret going Commando
Super Mario Bros. – Best video game becomes best movie candidate

T
Teen Wolf Too – Jason Bateman plays a teenage werewolf
ThanksKilling – Homicidal poultry flick
Thing With Two Heads, The – Heads and shoulders above the rest
Thunder in Paradise – Hulk Hogan co-stars with a talking boat
Top Dog – Chuck Norris and a dog. Watch out, they bite
Toxic Avenger, The – A toxic environment
Troll 2 – film lacks nothing – except a troll.

U
Universal Soldier: Day of Reckoning – Van Damme and Lundgren soldier on

V
Vampire Dog – Vampire Dog’s bark, bite equally good

W
What Happens in Vegas – Diaz and Kutcher sentenced to wedlock
What Women Want – Mel Gibson shows his sensitive, feminine side
Wild and Wonderful Whites of West Virginia, The – Family so out of control you’d think their last name was Lohan
Willow – Disney ponied up $4B for rights to Willow franchise
Wrestler, The – Flick that quickly goes down for a 3 count
Wyvern – Finest dragon attacking Alaska film I have ever seen

X
No X movies have been reviewed yet

Y
No Y movies have been reviewed yet

Z
Zombie Ass: Toilet of The Dead – Breaking new ground in zombie genre, and also breaking wind
Zombie Strippers – Jenna Jameson & Freddy Krueger shine
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